1. #1
    M2morris's Avatar Senior Member
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    Venting on an IL2 Forum
    By M2morris


    I lost it today. I switched to caf. Big mistake.
    Or perhaps I need therapy, decaf probably wouldn't help me.


    A Traffic Incident:



    I was driving along, in a good mood, and at the posted speed limit on a military installation.
    I was signalling and about to make a right turn when a soldier in a blue Nissan blew through a yield sign coming from my right. He was about to run into me. He skidded to a stop as did I. I had the right of way, so I gave him a 'what the eff man' hands with palms-up sign. He then peeled around the back of my car and went by flipping me the bird. AKA: middle finger straight up. The light was green. He proceeded to turn left at the intersection where I was going to turn right. I saw what he had done, the hand gesture wasn't taken lightly. I went left instead and in pursuit of him. I was almost seeing red at this point but still calm enough to hurt this guy. He apparently assumed that I would turn right and continue on my merry way, but I didn't. We were both driving way too fast for conditions; an MP would have loved to have seen it. I caught up to him and as he saw me following closely in his mirror he was obviously shocked and he began to swerve for some reason. He turned very sharply and unexpectedly around a corner and into a housing area where the speed limit was fifteen MPH. He then sped up to about fifty. I was chasing momentarily but I slowed down quickly not wanting to be more of a hazard to the community, and fifty in a fifteen is a very bad thing I had to regain control. The housing area was very twisted and easy to get lost in, or to loose someone who is chasing you. I prowled around slowly for a while looking for this jerk with the intention, in my enraged mind, of hurting him very badly. There was only one entrance/exit. Luckily I never found him. He had ducked into that housing area and escaped. It was lucky for both of us. I don't need that kind of crap. I really wish I could control my anger. Sometimes it gets the best of me. But damn it. I can't believe some ***holes think that they can get away with that kind of cr@p. But the guy ran like a rabbit. Soldier? Big effin deal. I have been on a few deployments myself so a PTSD excuse won't cut it with me. God help me.
    Can any of you guys relate to this?

    What do you do if someone gives you the middle finger sign?

    (I know I know; I'm supposed to just go about my merry way and try not to let it bother me.)

    But dammit that pi$$es me off.
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  2. #2
    Airmail109's Avatar Senior Member
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    Well...I've been in a few to many fights lately.

    So yes I have problems with anger, having said that my patience was tested to the maximum by my ex girlfriend and now I feel as if I have none left. I wanted a relationship where we helped each other grow emotionally and as people.

    Instead I ended up in a relationship that whilst I loved her, I was in limbo where I wasn't sure I should get out of it. I ended up becoming emotionally abusive myself and passive-agressive towards her.

    So matey, if your unhappy you lost it then at least you didn't with someone you liked. Just breath deep, seeing red and wanting to punch someone is the easiest anger to deal with. The hardest is deep seated long term chronic anger. You may have that, think about it.

    The problem is with anger is if you ever turn it inwards, boom you now have full blown depression.
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  3. #3
    The traffic assumption mistakes still happens all the time, but as I've gotten older it's not that important anymore like it was when I was younger where I would take issue with it. The last time I ever even got slightly mad was a couple of years ago after I got off work where I pulled into the two lane one way street, and a car that was a good ways back came up behind me and stood on his horn, cut around me and flipped me the bird. I thought what's he in such a hurry for and didn't think much about it. Anyway, there he is waiting for the light to change when I drove up beside him on his right side. I thought, heh heh. I tried my damndest to get his attention by waving my hand and yelling, but he wasn't having none of it and just kept looking straight ahead, though he knew exactly what I was doing. I guess what irks me is that folks who act aggressive when they drive should really not do this if they don't want to follow through and get busy with the person they're victimizing. I had this sort of thing happen plenty over the years, both driving and on foot, but only four times did I ever had to fight somebody when they pulled over and got out of their car, the last time in 2005, and two times I was on foot where the other folks pulled over.
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  4. #4
    M2morris's Avatar Senior Member
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    @ Aimail
    I have learned that anger is an emotion and my personal motto is 'no emotion' but I am only human. If someone steals your cool than they have gotten you where they want you or they have dragged you down to their level. Sry about your situation, that hurts. You may be right about my long term chronic. It seems to boil to the surface once in a while.
    Sounds corny but deep breathing and recognizing the signs of anger have helped me. But not today man. I wanted to rip that guy apart.
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  5. #5
    M2morris's Avatar Senior Member
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    Originally posted by Messaschnitzel:
    The traffic assumption mistakes still happens all the time, but as I've gotten older it's not that important anymore like it was when I was younger where I would take issue with it. The last time I ever even got slightly mad was a couple of years ago after I got off work where I pulled into the two lane one way street, and a car that was a good ways back came up behind me and stood on his horn, cut around me and flipped me the bird. I thought what's he in such a hurry for and didn't think much about it. Anyway, there he is waiting for the light to change when I drove up beside him on his right side. I thought, heh heh. I tried my damndest to get his attention by waving my hand and yelling, but he wasn't having none of it and just kept looking straight ahead, though he knew exactly what I was doing. I guess what irks me is that folks who act aggressive when they drive should really not do this if they don't want to follow through and get busy with the person they're victimizing. I had this sort of thing happen plenty over the years, both driving and on foot, but only four times did I ever had to fight somebody when they pulled over and got out of their car, the last time in 2005, and two times I was on foot where the other folks pulled over.
    Yeah same here as I have gotten older they have gotten fewer and farther between, it has been years since that sort of thing has bothered me THAT bad. So it has me a little worried. I thought I was above that now. Well, I guess I'm still not.
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  6. #6
    R_Target's Avatar Banned
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    Originally posted by M2morris:
    If someone steals your cool than they have gotten you where they want you or they have dragged you down to their level.
    Bingo. I always smile and wave cheerfully in these situations. They don't know what to make of it.
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  7. #7
    I don't drive at all and I've never been quick to anger to the point of violence (though I'm easily irritated) so I've never really gone through this. Though a couple days ago I had a dental drilling procedure to get some crowns put in and the pain for the day and a half afterwards was so bad I felt like if someone annoyed me and pushed me over the edge I wouldn't be able to contain myself from doing something crazy. Fortunately the pain has largely gone away and I'm buzzing on advil and caffeine so I feel much better now.

    Anyway I would say it's just not worth it to get in a fight with someone over traffic. Yeah it's annoying but if nobody gets hit then just let it go. I've seen people take traffic incidences like tailgating personally and I've never understood it but I guess if you have to drive long distances every day it really adds up.

    I would first try and realize inside yourself that it's not worth it to take something like that personally and resort to violence. If you don't get hurt then I really don't see the reason for using violence to cause someone to get hurt--either yourself or the other other guy. Yeah someone is being a **** to you but just let it go and you'll probably never run into them again. If you do run into them then by all means don't let them bully you. If you do get hit then that is what insurance is for. You can get sent to jail or even sued for assault and battery, yeah it's not as bad as more serious crimes but it seems like it's a lot worse to go to some crappy jail for a few weeks or have to pay a fine or bail or whatever and have that on your record than to just put up with someone's middle finger for a second or two.

    If you get put into a rage about stuff like that then I would do whatever you can to calm down and get over it. I think accepting that it's not worth it to escalate something would help de-escalate your emotions, but something like pulling over to the side of the road and just clearing your mind or punching the steering wheel or something would help. Just don't take some random person being a **** personally. If they are going out of their way to be a **** in your personal life because they know you then yes take it personally and try and resolve it however you can (hopefully without jail time etc!)

    Sorry if I sound preachy but that is just kind of my philosophy. I've been in those kinds of rage scenarios and I just have to step back and think about it and try to get myself to start thinking rationally and move on with my day.



    Originally posted by Aimail101:
    Well...I've been in a few to many fights lately.
    Well you are English. A steady diet of Big Macs and Bud Light will plump you up and make you too lethargic to be "arsed" (bothered) to do anything about anything. It's the American way!
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  8. #8
    Had a shooting arise from a road rage incident not far from where I live. Apparently this 'feud' started about twenty miles down the highway. As the person trying to get away finally exited the highway, he was stuck at a traffic light. The other driver in this road rage incident rammed his car into the first car and promptly got out of his car and put two bullets into the driver.


    Not that YOU would do that, but man, you never know who is driving today. There's lots of angry people with pent up frustrations and they're looking for ways to release it. It's the one in a million you don't want to run into.
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  9. #9
    GoToAway's Avatar Senior Member
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    Originally posted by M2morris:
    I saw what he had done, the hand gesture wasn't taken lightly. I went left instead and in pursuit of him. I was almost seeing red at this point but still calm enough to hurt this guy.
    It was a hand gesture. It did not hurt you, your family, or anyone else on the planet.

    Your actions put lives at risk over the orientation of a finger on a hand belonging to a person that you'll never see again in your life. You need to get a grip, because if you don't, somebody is going to get hurt.

    I've seen people like you in traffic. I was once behind a three town chase because somebody cut off another person. He spent the next 15 miles trying to ram the offender off the road. Eventually he cornered him on a dead end--I have no idea what happened. But his actions put everybody else on the road at risk. If I'd had a cell phone, you can bet the cops would have had the plate # and I would have been more than happy to bear witness to it.

    Go take anger management or something. To suffer from that level of rage from nothing more than a hand gesture suggests that you have a much deeper anger problem. You're either going to wind up being arrested or hurting somebody--or both.

    Think of your family.
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  10. #10
    M2morris's Avatar Senior Member
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    Originally posted by Ba5tard5word:
    Sorry if I sound preachy but that is just kind of my philosophy. I've been in those kinds of rage scenarios and I just have to step back and think about it and try to get myself to start thinking rationally and move on with my day.


    I expected preachy when I posted this topic. Go ahead with it and lay those sermons down. I should take it all to heart. Maybe if everyone tells their story and/or gives me a sermon then maybe I will come out of it with a 'longer fuse'
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