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View Full Version : a little bit of mind sprouting stupidity (topic realated)



yehonatan.roth
09-27-2007, 01:27 PM
well some things come in mind in an AC way decided to write it down maybe inspire some one(doubt it) to write silly thing or great genius things (doubt it prove me wrong in an associative matter...

a man walks down the path thousands usually walk in during the day no one is there now, it is night the moon shows a full house and the loser will end up in a grave with no haste what so ever the man walk's towards the tower of David trying to climb it... failing... he grunts in no satisfaction walking slowly away knowing his ancestors are probably laughing at him now saying: "Heh some hasshain you are".

The damn night seems endless while this man walked an, oh so familiar path, seen, but careful with in his own limits.
walking... walking helps he thought...

he passes a sign hardly showing any colors as if willing to blend into the building for eternity he tries to read it: "butcher shop"

I remember this place...
a flash behind his eyes signal him he will soon be reminiscing on his childhood, he stops, not willing to admit any thing was ever good in his life and passes on to the end of the street just to turn around and pass the butcher shop again
he remembers that this was the only shop his uncle was to buy in and that his father deeply disagreed as in some form of high moral that was unknown to him.

A turn to the left reveals that he is not alone frightening an old woman with green shoes a black dress and yellow eyes he asks: "are you all right miss? I didn't mean to scare you like that"
"quite fine young man, your a good soul (she pinches his cheek, he grunts)"

he started moving faster he had a feeling he is to be home something is in the wrong tonight something stronger then his deep agony of not belonging to the family in any way.

he reaches home looks about... no one to greet him, he lived with his mother father brother and his wife, no one seemed to be home for the lack of noise he walk in with no apparent overwhelming feeling when suddenly he sees his hole family on the ground bleeding to death his heart was pounding his eye were burning he felt pain and anger like never before his stomach twisted and turned he dropped on his knees looking at his father a man in his 70's the only one still breathing and he said:" what happened father? How did this?"

"our next door neighbor avenge me..."

he dies in his arm...

ten minutes, still, not moved an inch, head down hair all over the front of his head,
he raises takes the long sword from the living room he dose not think why rushes out the door running towards the neighbors house he bashes the door in releases a blood filled scream into the air stabs the neighbor and the neighbor realest a shot, he dies slowly finally he honored his name finally the name of his ancestors is made true and fitting to his family

this is the death of Altair the last...
black fills the eyes, the wind blows throw his finger tips, every muscle in his body is released...
silenced for eternity

THE END
-----------------------------------------------

hope you liked it, feel free to add stuff of your own no rules needed because I am sure admins will fix any unwanted mishaps by any ones part.

Well? Start writing!!!!

Edit: 22:30 september 27 2007: i fixet all the bad spelling with word its readable now http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

yehonatan.roth
09-27-2007, 01:27 PM
well some things come in mind in an AC way decided to write it down maybe inspire some one(doubt it) to write silly thing or great genius things (doubt it prove me wrong in an associative matter...

a man walks down the path thousands usually walk in during the day no one is there now, it is night the moon shows a full house and the loser will end up in a grave with no haste what so ever the man walk's towards the tower of David trying to climb it... failing... he grunts in no satisfaction walking slowly away knowing his ancestors are probably laughing at him now saying: "Heh some hasshain you are".

The damn night seems endless while this man walked an, oh so familiar path, seen, but careful with in his own limits.
walking... walking helps he thought...

he passes a sign hardly showing any colors as if willing to blend into the building for eternity he tries to read it: "butcher shop"

I remember this place...
a flash behind his eyes signal him he will soon be reminiscing on his childhood, he stops, not willing to admit any thing was ever good in his life and passes on to the end of the street just to turn around and pass the butcher shop again
he remembers that this was the only shop his uncle was to buy in and that his father deeply disagreed as in some form of high moral that was unknown to him.

A turn to the left reveals that he is not alone frightening an old woman with green shoes a black dress and yellow eyes he asks: "are you all right miss? I didn't mean to scare you like that"
"quite fine young man, your a good soul (she pinches his cheek, he grunts)"

he started moving faster he had a feeling he is to be home something is in the wrong tonight something stronger then his deep agony of not belonging to the family in any way.

he reaches home looks about... no one to greet him, he lived with his mother father brother and his wife, no one seemed to be home for the lack of noise he walk in with no apparent overwhelming feeling when suddenly he sees his hole family on the ground bleeding to death his heart was pounding his eye were burning he felt pain and anger like never before his stomach twisted and turned he dropped on his knees looking at his father a man in his 70's the only one still breathing and he said:" what happened father? How did this?"

"our next door neighbor avenge me..."

he dies in his arm...

ten minutes, still, not moved an inch, head down hair all over the front of his head,
he raises takes the long sword from the living room he dose not think why rushes out the door running towards the neighbors house he bashes the door in releases a blood filled scream into the air stabs the neighbor and the neighbor realest a shot, he dies slowly finally he honored his name finally the name of his ancestors is made true and fitting to his family

this is the death of Altair the last...
black fills the eyes, the wind blows throw his finger tips, every muscle in his body is released...
silenced for eternity

THE END
-----------------------------------------------

hope you liked it, feel free to add stuff of your own no rules needed because I am sure admins will fix any unwanted mishaps by any ones part.

Well? Start writing!!!!

Edit: 22:30 september 27 2007: i fixet all the bad spelling with word its readable now http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

moqqy
09-27-2007, 01:39 PM
No offence, but check your spelling:P

MeAltairLol
09-27-2007, 01:45 PM
Yeh, about the spelling and punctuation. But the story was ace! It kept me on the edge of my seat, and an unexpected ending!

yehonatan.roth
09-27-2007, 02:10 PM
Thank you so mutch http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif
i know i have spelling problems feel free to correct me if you feel like it i will take notice and give thanks

write something too we will make a story thread out of it... http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Faylinks
09-27-2007, 02:34 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by moqqy:
No offence, but check your spelling:P </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
if you can read it, shut up.
and yehonatan.roth that is VERY tipical i have not seen that exactly, but its been done 1000 times, diffrent context, but same idea..

yehonatan.roth
09-27-2007, 02:37 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Faylinks:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by moqqy:
No offence, but check your spelling:P </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
if you can read it, shut up.
and yehonatan.roth that is VERY tipical i have not seen that exactly, but its been done 1000 times, diffrent context, but same idea.. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

i don't think he ment any offence...
so please don't scorn him.

if you have any idea please do add it to the thread, i diden't see any writeing's maby i diden't look hard inofe http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/35.gif

SloppyCracker
09-27-2007, 02:38 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Faylinks:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by moqqy:
No offence, but check your spelling:P </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
if you can read it, shut up.
and yehonatan.roth that is VERY tipical i have not seen that exactly, but its been done 1000 times, diffrent context, but same idea.. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

You need to relax.