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voyager_663rd
02-26-2005, 01:35 PM
Some signs that have been seen:

1) Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

2) In a laundramat: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all clothes when the light goes out.

3) In a department store: Bargain Basement upstairs.

4) In an office: would the person who took the step ladder please bring it back or further steps will be taken.

5) In an office: After tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.

6) outside a used goods store: we exchange anything--bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a great bargain?

7) Notice in health food store: Closed due to illness.

8) In a safari park: Elephants please stay in your car

9) The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

10) If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.

11) On a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING (please knock hard on the door--the bell doesn't work).

EURO_Snoopy
02-26-2005, 01:52 PM
http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/122093.JPG

steve_v
02-26-2005, 01:56 PM
http://home.earthlink.net/~viner45/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/obvious.jpg

EURO_Snoopy
02-26-2005, 01:56 PM
How about bumper stickers?

The other day I went to the local religious book store, where I saw a HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car and I am really glad I did.

What an uplifting experience followed.
I was stopped at a light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord, and I didn't notice that the light had changed. That bumper sticker really worked!

I found lots of people who love Jesus. Why, the guy behind me started to honk like crazy. He must REALLY love the lord because pretty soon he leaned out his window and yelled, "Jesus Christ!" as loud as he could. It was like a football game with him shouting, "GO, JESUS CHRIST, GO!!

Everyone started honking too, so I leaned out my window and waved and smiled at all those loving people.
There must have been a guy from Florida back there because I could hear him yelling something about a sunny beach and I saw him waving in a funny way with his middle finger stuck up in the air.

I asked my two kids what that meant. They kind of squirmed, looked at each other, giggled and told me that it was the Hawaiian Good Luck sign. So, I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back.

A couple of people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and were walking toward me. I bet they wanted to pray but just then I noticed that the light had changed and I stepped on the gas. It's a good thing I did because I was the only driver to get across the intersection.

I looked back at them standing there. I leaned out of the window, gave them a big smile and held up the Hawaiian Good Luck sign as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks.

Wilburnator
02-26-2005, 01:59 PM
I always liked "Illiterate? Write for help"

EURO_Snoopy
02-26-2005, 02:02 PM
On a bit of a roll here

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll
raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

amzanig huh?

Monty_Thrud
02-26-2005, 02:05 PM
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gifRUDDY LOL!...ROFLMAO..HEHE!..like it...like it...AHH!..isnt laughter a wonderful thing...SHEESH!...you could've saved this for monday morning, but thanks anyway...tehe http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif

EURO_Snoopy
02-26-2005, 02:13 PM
Ok, last one from me...

For the guys in community help:

Please submit your DxDiag

http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/submitdxdiag.jpg
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif

F16_Neo
02-26-2005, 03:39 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v109/F16_Neo/trams/propeller.jpg

Covino
02-26-2005, 03:48 PM
http://www.boreme.com/bm/SEP02/a/signs/pic4.jpg

blairgowrie
02-26-2005, 04:03 PM
Author, Author!

I really like this thread. lol

F16_Neo
02-26-2005, 04:42 PM
Strange humor at dev team (ask a Swede to translate sign http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif ) (P-40E)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v109/F16_Neo/trams/korv.jpg
This thread is now officially On Topic. http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

voyager_663rd
02-26-2005, 05:11 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by blairgowrie:
Author, Author!

I really like this thread. lol <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Thank you. Thank you very much.

jakeand
02-26-2005, 05:16 PM
I like this one...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v655/jakeand/Flyg/IL2/unwise.jpg

regards

Jake

-HH-Dubbo
02-26-2005, 05:19 PM
http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif
Heh heh. I've posted some of these before but...
http://www.angelfire.com/falcon/nightschpanker/Funny_Vancouver.jpg

-HH-Dubbo
02-26-2005, 05:20 PM
....and..
http://www.angelfire.com/falcon/nightschpanker/Gods_Creatures.jpg

-HH-Dubbo
02-26-2005, 05:21 PM
http://www.angelfire.com/falcon/nightschpanker/Public_Bar.jpg

-HH-Dubbo
02-26-2005, 05:22 PM
And my all time favourite....
http://www.angelfire.com/falcon/nightschpanker/Sign.jpg

Lucius_Esox
02-26-2005, 05:23 PM
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif smiling here!!

Foxtrot-Hotel
02-26-2005, 05:32 PM
rofllol some real classics here, gimme more!!

The_Presz
02-26-2005, 07:24 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v645/The_Presz/analchili.jpg

EURO_Snoopy
02-26-2005, 07:52 PM
http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/women1.gif

-HH-Dubbo
02-26-2005, 09:06 PM
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif
Nice Snoopy

tjaika1910
02-27-2005, 05:27 AM
Oleg can be too inspired of this forum in making patches and BOB. This is a worst case scenario with a forum-inspired war-game

http://www.hugi.is/hahradi/bigboxes.php?box_id=51208&f_id=1191

JG301_nils
02-27-2005, 06:30 AM
I remember once in a pub in Scotland, on the mens room there, I saw a sign where it said:
"WE AIM TO PLEASE,
YOU AIM TOO PLEASE" http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

cajun16
02-27-2005, 07:53 AM
How about, "Don't call me illerate, buddy. I'll have you know my mommy and daddy were married a week before I was born!"

zdenkaxx1
02-27-2005, 08:10 AM
proof that marriage exists in the animal kingdom

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/zdenka362436/Proofthatmarriageexistsintheanimalkingdom.jpg

DarkCanuck420
02-27-2005, 12:23 PM
A Brave Penguin

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/day420tripper/BRAVEPENGUINE.jpg

tjaika1910
02-27-2005, 03:28 PM
... especially since he traveled around the world to do that...

Jasko76
02-27-2005, 03:43 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by F16_Neo:
Strange humor at dev team (ask a Swede to translate sign http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif ) (P-40E)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v109/F16_Neo/trams/korv.jpg
This thread is now officially On Topic. http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What the heck - BAJSKORV http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/88.gif

I didn't see that one in a P-40 lately http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

Snyggt!

NorrisMcWhirter
02-27-2005, 03:53 PM
http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/11-04/792132.1.jpg


http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/oct03/cpr_for_blondes.jpg
http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/oct03/elephant04.jpg
http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/oct03/bicycle_lane_with_poles.jpg http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/oct03/pizza09.jpg http://www.thesunmachine.net/image_archive/archive/oct03/neighbours_family_photo.jpg

Norris

zdenkaxx1
02-27-2005, 04:32 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/zdenka362436/watch.jpg


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/zdenka362436/Notmyjob.jpg

woofiedog
02-27-2005, 08:46 PM
<span class="ev_code_YELLOW">Today's Run Will Be...</span>
http://www.bobandtom.com/gen3/5cover_img/iraqi_beer_run.jpg

GAU-8
02-27-2005, 11:51 PM
i just gotta find it!!!...

i took a picture of a TACO BELL in a small texas town, when visiting a friend.

if you look carefully at the picture, youll see that they have given "access" for those with wheel chairs, a politically correct, low grade ramp, to the front of the door, rather than stairs

problem.

in the middle of the ramp is a sign too big to go around that says "NOT AN ENTRY".. with a graphic showing customers that the driveway they see is an exit for the drive thru.....go figure.

where did i put it....

Monson74
02-28-2005, 12:17 AM
I once saw a sign at a government office that said "PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE THIS SIGN" http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/blink.gif

Amon26
02-28-2005, 02:03 AM
I don't have a photo of it, but I own a metal sign that says

"If you can read this you're in range"

womenfly
02-28-2005, 06:35 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by EURO_Snoopy:
http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/women1.gif <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I don't get it? http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/blink.gifhttp://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/women1.gif

BRASSTURTLE
02-28-2005, 12:25 PM
I have a sign at home that says <span class="ev_code_YELLOW">SENIOR CITIZEN CROSSING</span>

GT182
02-28-2005, 01:07 PM
EURO_Snoopy, next time use just the pinky finger... it means - "This is for those that don't deserve the best." That way you aren't passing on any "Good Luck".

But don't tell the kids about it. You know how carried away they get. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-wink.gif

Friendly_flyer
02-28-2005, 01:37 PM
Thanks ladds (and Womanfly), you really made my day!

Buckaroo12
02-28-2005, 10:17 PM
<< The Following Were Actually Taken >From
Classified Ads In Newspapers:

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL
LITTLE DOG.

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 COCKER SPANIEL
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG

FREE PUPPIES ... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD, PART
STUPID DOG


*** 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer ***

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE ... ONLY USED ON SNOWY
DAYS.

TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN
1988 MUSTANG, 5L,
AUTO,EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800

COWS FOR SALE. NEVER BRED CALVES. ALSO 1 GAY
BULL FOR SALE.

FULL SIZED MATTRESS. 20 YR. WARRANTY. LIKE
NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.

NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY

BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE
PRODUCTS."

HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER "IF IT'S IN
STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"

GEORGIA PEACHES CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.

NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE
OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND
FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX
SPRINGS - $175.
Judging from the success of our garage sale
today, guess our ad was a little
more appealing.



OUR SOFA WILL SEAT THE WHOLE MOB. 100% ITALIAN
LEATHER.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY! SELLING WASHER & DRYER
$300.

FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia
Britannica. 45 volumes.
Excellent condition. $1,000.00 OBO. No longer
needed. Recently
married; wife knows everything. >>

Badsight.
03-01-2005, 03:16 AM
http://img8.exs.cx/img8/7335/news5jb.jpg

jetsetsam
03-01-2005, 03:32 AM
I see this one on a telephone pole every day:

"Lose 30 lbs of fat. Samples provided"

steve_v
03-01-2005, 04:37 AM
Poking fun at Bill Gates


http://home.earthlink.net/~viner45/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/gates1.jpg


http://home.earthlink.net/~viner45/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/gates2.jpg

EURO_Snoopy
03-01-2005, 05:04 AM
http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/gates_newos.gif

http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/00004107.jpg


http://airwarfare.com/AWX/images/temp/Tools-7.gif