PDA

View Full Version : The really true reason Adolf didn't invade



XyZspineZyX
10-02-2003, 11:41 AM
Despite various nefartious postings already deposited in this thread I would like to point out that the real but little known reason that stopped Adolf invading England was as follows:

On the morning of Monday the thirteenth of July 1938, Adolf Hitler discovered he was sufferring from a syndrome known as Chrome's disease,an unsual disease that, apart from making your bottom really really itchy, makes the sides of the sufferer's moustache full off - leaving only the centre part of the moustache.

After much reasearch and bottom scratching, young Adolf discovered that the only way to stop this selective alopecia was to apply a grease found only in the ailmentary canals of the male Fogsworth-canyard sheep, a sheep bred only in two areas of the world - the first in Farnsworth in southern England; the second in the town of Dubbo in the middle of NSW Australia.

Even young Adolf knew at that early stage that the Aussies would be too tough a nutt to crack - so he opted for the only sensable course of action - he decided to invade England - specifically the Southern part of England, in search of a cure.

Of course, even with his elementary problems, he wasn't expecting such stiff resistance from the pomms (helped of course by the Aussie's) and by the time that he realised they'd lost the BOB his personal physician Bryin Eckland Gerhardt had informed him that his selective moustache Alopecia ('SMA' for short) was permanent.

At that precise momen young half mosuatchioed Adolf promptly deveoloped a taste for cheap Vodka to help him drown his sorrows. In his last moments of sobrietry he immediately gave up on his plans to invade England and decided to invade Russia to assuage his new found thirst.

So help me, this is the truth as we Aussie's know it.

S! Headwax.

XyZspineZyX
10-02-2003, 11:41 AM
Despite various nefartious postings already deposited in this thread I would like to point out that the real but little known reason that stopped Adolf invading England was as follows:

On the morning of Monday the thirteenth of July 1938, Adolf Hitler discovered he was sufferring from a syndrome known as Chrome's disease,an unsual disease that, apart from making your bottom really really itchy, makes the sides of the sufferer's moustache full off - leaving only the centre part of the moustache.

After much reasearch and bottom scratching, young Adolf discovered that the only way to stop this selective alopecia was to apply a grease found only in the ailmentary canals of the male Fogsworth-canyard sheep, a sheep bred only in two areas of the world - the first in Farnsworth in southern England; the second in the town of Dubbo in the middle of NSW Australia.

Even young Adolf knew at that early stage that the Aussies would be too tough a nutt to crack - so he opted for the only sensable course of action - he decided to invade England - specifically the Southern part of England, in search of a cure.

Of course, even with his elementary problems, he wasn't expecting such stiff resistance from the pomms (helped of course by the Aussie's) and by the time that he realised they'd lost the BOB his personal physician Bryin Eckland Gerhardt had informed him that his selective moustache Alopecia ('SMA' for short) was permanent.

At that precise momen young half mosuatchioed Adolf promptly deveoloped a taste for cheap Vodka to help him drown his sorrows. In his last moments of sobrietry he immediately gave up on his plans to invade England and decided to invade Russia to assuage his new found thirst.

So help me, this is the truth as we Aussie's know it.

S! Headwax.

XyZspineZyX
10-02-2003, 11:46 AM
One thread will suffice

<p align="center">
<A HREF="http://mudmovers.com/sturmovik_101/FAQ.htm" TARGET=_blank>
Unofficial IL-2 Community FAQ</font></A>

<fontsize=2>Hunter82's Tech Pages (http://mudmovers.com/tech/tech_pages.htm)
Forgotten Battles Reality Check (http://www.simhq.com/_air/air_065a.html)
</font></p>