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View Full Version : A gaping hole in this 'simulation'



blakduk
08-23-2006, 07:43 PM
People keep referring to this creation by Oleg as a simulation rather than a game. However, i would like to point out to people that nowhere in this game is there any evidence of the mountains of paperwork you have to complete when operating this virtual machinery.
I just totalled a car earlier this week- i spun at 100km/h on a corner and took off the front and rear of the vehicle. As i spun (and nearly rolled) I furiously yelled an ancient Anglo-Saxon single syllable word referring to the act procreation about a dozen times- which i believe is a record as the whole incident only lasted about two seconds.
From the moment i managed to extricate myself from the steaming wreckage i was accosted by paperwork-
1) statement to the police
2) statement to the ambulance
3) statement to the doctor in the ED (whom i had been giving professional advice to just last week http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/shady.gif)
4) health insurance form
5) workcover form
6) car fleet management form
7) incident management form (its a health dept thing)
8) notification to managers forms
9) doctors form to indicate i am healthy enough to return to work http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif (not really after all this f*****ing paperwork!)
10) paperwork to car fleet manager to request a new car
11) as well as all the other meetings and clinical management paperwork and meetings that i have had to reorganise, reschedule, cancel, and ignore.

Why can't life be like in Oleg's world where i can just hit refly????
BTW- the great thing about TrackIR is that you dont have to move your head very much, which is lucky as my neck is really stiff.

VW-IceFire
08-23-2006, 08:48 PM
Its a game simulation. Its not a true factory level simulation but its a game simulation. Its as simulatory as a $49.99 game can get http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

Sorry to hear about totalling your car. What kind of car was it? I love cars nearly as much as planes and I know alot of people cherish their cars. Its always sad to have one damaged or totalled...although considering the alternative I'm glad to know that you are well enough to post here on this forum.

BfHeFwMe
08-23-2006, 09:06 PM
Clearly the roads overmodeled. We demand a patching crew. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif

blakduk
08-23-2006, 09:35 PM
VW-IceFire- it was a Ford Falcon XT. Nothing remarkable about it, although i did really like driving it. It was just a fleet car for the health department. I was doing about 1000km a week in it- the size of the area health service i work for, just my region of it, is about the size of Wales.

BfHeFwMe- 'Clearly the roads overmodeled. We demand a patching crew'.
How right you are; i broke the strut of the left front wheel and buckled the rim of the right rear tyre. There are two big gouges out of the bitumen now- so it does need to be patched http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

Pirschjaeger
08-23-2006, 09:44 PM
Originally posted by blakduk:
I furiously yelled an ancient Anglo-Saxon single syllable word referring to the act procreation about a dozen times.

How is this different from playing IL-2? http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif


Originally posted by blakduk:From the moment i managed to extricate myself from the steaming wreckage i was accosted by paperwork-
.

Ctrl + E works for me. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-wink.gif

Ha ha ha, glad to hear you are relatively unscathed. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/25.gif

Fords are easily replaced but intellegent and humorous simmers are irreplacable. Gotta love this community. Where else can we enjoy laughing at someone's near-death experience?

Are we Irish? http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-surprised.gif

Fritz

Pirschjaeger
08-23-2006, 09:50 PM
BTW, thx for the cool quote. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/25.gif

http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

blakduk
08-23-2006, 10:07 PM
Pirschjaeger- how stupid of me, it never occured to me to hit 'Ctrl + E' http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/35.gif
Then again, how many forms would i have had to complete to justify opening the parachute, landing in a paddock, hitching a lift back to the Ford etc http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif

I have just spent the past 30minutes talking to the payroll office about the correct form to complete on my timesheet. It seems they have a problem in that i was technically already at work rather than heading to work, although i wasnt due to officially start work that early in the morning http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif.
Also, as the doctor in the emergency dept put me on 'workcover' it has to be marked differently on the form. I incorrectly marked my timesheet as 'sick leave'. I had to apologise to them as apparently i am causing them a lot of problems by having such inconvenient facts surrounding my accident. I should in future study the manual on how to crash a car more carefully so that i dont get the bureaucracy confused http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif
Has anyone ever seen the TV series 'Yes Minister'- THAT IS MY WORLD!!

I have a pain in my neck both metaphorically and literally.

Feathered_IV
08-23-2006, 10:25 PM
I have enough paperwork around from all the reciepts and statements from upgrades and peripherals I need to play this game http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-tongue.gif

Glad you're okay though http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/25.gif

rugame
08-23-2006, 10:43 PM
Got your ticket yet?

http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

blakduk
08-23-2006, 10:54 PM
Originally posted by rugame:
Got your ticket yet?

http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

If you mean 'Have the police given me a ticket yet?', the answer is 'No'. I've got my fingers crossed that they will make a mess of their paperwork and forget to give me one.
But if i get one, so should the fox that was sitting on the road and distracted me. If i had been in a Yak i could have run the b*gger over, hit the embankment, and kept on going http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

SithSpeeder
08-23-2006, 11:26 PM
the fox that was sitting on the road and distracted me. If i had been in a Yak i could have run the b*gger over, hit the embankment, and kept on going Yeah, women. Oh, you meant like a little bugger with a tail? A quick burst from 400 yards out (carefully aiming overhead) should have scared him off.

You just need to map guns to a steering wheel button. http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Glad to hear you are OK. Get that neck thing checkout out, though (don't want it haunting you in the future).

* _54th_Speeder *

BiscuitKnight
08-24-2006, 01:30 AM
You do realise you'll ne'er live this down? :P

Tully__
08-24-2006, 03:34 AM
Glad you're safe Blakduk but sorry to hear about all the hassle.

Copperhead310th
08-24-2006, 03:05 PM
OMG Rty Driving a truck for a living. all the paper work you just mentiond.....and the multiply by 5. AND YOU DO IT EVERY SINGLE DAY.
Shipping envoices
maintenace sheets
Haz Mat Sheet
Fuel Trip reports
Milage reports
Damage reports
A log book that you MUST log every day...
inclduing when you OFF DUTY. Ie...hey it's nice to be home....sipping a cold Lee-Wiser...got my feet proped up on the back deck.....birds chirping on a beautiful Sunday afternoon...

and.....AWWWWW dammmmm! I've got to do my log book for the week end.
and that's just for starters.

So....Paperwork sux. Agreed. Needs more Refly!

Taylortony
08-24-2006, 06:34 PM
Originally posted by BfHeFwMe:
Clearly the roads overmodeled. We demand a patching crew. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif


Come to the UK mate.......... Our roads are patched up to 30.05M at the very minimum

Divine-Wind
08-24-2006, 08:44 PM
Originally posted by Taylortony:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by BfHeFwMe:
Clearly the roads overmodeled. We demand a patching crew. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif


Come to the UK mate.......... Our roads are patched up to 30.05M at the very minimum </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif


Originally posted by blakduk:
I furiously yelled an ancient Anglo-Saxon single syllable word referring to the act procreation about a dozen times.
"BUTTSECKS! BUTTSECKS! BUTTSECKS! BUTTSECKS! ..."

JamesBlonde888
08-25-2006, 12:17 AM
For your next car I advise a Delta-Wood panneled Polikarpov station wagon with Autopilot.

TC_Stele
08-25-2006, 12:21 AM
Ouch, sounds like a bad accident indeed. Glad you're ok.

As for refly, I wish I could do that with girls who reject me. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-sad.gif

BiscuitKnight
08-25-2006, 01:01 AM
Originally posted by Taylortony:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by BfHeFwMe:
Clearly the roads overmodeled. We demand a patching crew. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif


Come to the UK mate.......... Our roads are patched up to 30.05M at the very minimum </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Living in Australia, our roads are in the Alpha phase...

Jasko76
08-25-2006, 01:37 AM
You totalled a Ford Falcon XT? Not a big loss. If it had been a Falcon XB coupe, well, I for one would be very sorry! "His name is Max, the warrior Max."

Tully__
08-25-2006, 06:32 AM
Originally posted by Jasko76:
...If it had been a Falcon XB coupe... It still would have needed a custom front end to hold a steering alignment as far as the end of the driveway at the alignment centre http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_wink.gif


Other than that I agree with you, an XB coupe with a nice warmup under the bonnet is a good thing.

WB_Outlaw
08-25-2006, 07:42 AM
Wow, Ford hasn't made the Falcon here in the U.S. since 1970. It's really depressing that they are offering RWD cars overseas but just about all you can get over here is FWD garbage. I may never be able to forgive the japanese imports for the curse of FWD.

--Outlaw.

Jasko76
08-25-2006, 08:57 AM
Originally posted by WB_Outlaw:
Wow, Ford hasn't made the Falcon here in the U.S. since 1970. It's really depressing that they are offering RWD cars overseas but just about all you can get over here is FWD garbage. I may never be able to forgive the japanese imports for the curse of FWD.

--Outlaw.

Don't blame Japs for FWD, it is a French invention, made popular by the Britts. And it's not their fault that US cars of the '70s were mostly big, ugly and slow - junk. Save for one car - Pontiac Trans AM!

BiscuitKnight
08-25-2006, 09:33 AM
Ford Falcon isn't available in the states? http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/blink.gif

Bearcat99
08-25-2006, 01:12 PM
Whats stopping you from doing paperwork? You have access to paper right? I'm just sayin..... http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/winky.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif