View Full Version : What does your Hero think of the others?

09-10-2017, 04:55 PM
This thread is a just for fun mindgame. Don't take it oo seriously. What does your Favorite Hero think of the others?

I know the heroes have mostly a sparingly mentioned Backround, but imagine, they Live in the same World. They battle each other pretty much every Day.
I'll start with my Favorite Character is the Conquerer, a rough and Tumble Warrior, a former Criminal forced into War. Somehow they manage not to die, and become an Elite Warrior.

Now here is what i think Conqueror thinks of the Other Heroes:

The Warden
"Eeeh, they are alright. Ya know they always run around with tha: Oh no look! We gotta save the Innocents. Oh no you will pay for this! And Stuff. They should really loosen up a bit. Other than that they are pretty chill."

The Lawbringer
"Honestly the Stick this Guy has up his @$$ must be bigger than his damn Poleaxe. Always going around calling us Criminal Scum and Stuff like that, and Screaming for the Law! Man this dude is annoying. We like his armour though, heh maybe we can get it if we smash his head in when no one looks."

The Peacekeeper
"That,.... that thing isn't human. She,....She ain't here is she? We fear no man!, but that,..... thing,... It scares us.!"

Male Conq:
"We really can't stand this dude. He always Acts as if he's the Boss or something, while wearing a FRIGGIN SKIRT, seriously, this dude is a bit annoying. If could just stop shouting Orders he'd actually be tolerable"
Female Conq:
"A bit annoying,..... but those legs Yum ! "

"Honestly these Guys are insane. We don't want to be here, we have too. But these guys, they signed up just for the Bloodshed, they don't even get payed that much! Honestly Fight loving Freaks."

"These Guys are annoying. You know how many Shields we loose because of theses Chopp Happy Mainiacs? Once we went through 10 Shields in one friggin battle! "

"Yum thoose abs! Always a pleasure to Fight. I mean if we can keep them from Crushing our Skulls that is."

"We are jealous of that beard!" (Yes even the female Conq). "That beard is just soooo Badass! We need one as well. Hm. Might work if we cut it of his corpse and glue it to our Chins."

"These Speer Sweeps have made us kiss the ground more often than we'd like to admit. Can't say much about her. She fights well. If we weren't enemies maybe we'd invite her to a Booze Party."

"Yeah alright, this dude IS compensating for something. How the heck does he even carried that monstrous thing of a Sword around? And he also got a Skirt like the Centurion. Do these outlandish dudes all wear Skirts?"

"You know if we weren't enemies, we could build a band with these Guys! I swear when they slash at our Shields so lightning quick, it kinda sounds like music when we keep blocking every hit. We gotta say these guys make some nice music."

"Really now? What is with all these oversized Swords? Do they also need to compensate? Just because it's longer doesn't mean it's better. Also they got ugly Masks, are they supposed to scre someone? We really don't get the choosen they are very strange People."

"BIG DUDE INCOMING! Fighting this dude is,... strange. Normally we just make like a Brick and Crush our opponents. But this big Guy? No chance. Sow what do we do? We dance around him like a friggin Ballerina, and somehow it works! But we gotta say, he'd has a mean swing, and would probably make a World Golf Champion."

"Stab stab, stabity stab! Is this Girl peacekeepers long lost little sister or something? It's enemies like these where we are very glad that we have our Shields. I really don't want to imagine what would hapen to us if we didn't have one."

"SOMEONE GET THIS FLY OFF ME GAAAH! These guys buzz around like flys, jumping through the air, it really makes one mad! They die just as easily, but hell these guys go on our nerves! Annyone got a Fly swatter?"

Now how does you Favorite hero think of the others?

09-10-2017, 07:18 PM
My peacekeeper finds this interesting enough to comment upon.

Warden: I suppose every band needs a white knight to put on a pillar, live long enough though and that pillar will be torn down, heroes don't get to stay heroes while they live.

Conqueror: Rah! Rah? Rahrah RAH! Don't mind me, we have an understanding. Criminals and the desperate fill both of our ranks and a crucible awaits both of us before we take the field in a meaningful way. Here is the thing about crucibles, you can be broken by them or come out stronger.

Peacekeeper: Secrets we share we may never tell.

Lawbringer: My what a big axe you have, compensating much? Used to be they said the law is blind, now they say it is pitiless. I am not certain this is a good change.

Centurion: Apparently they like to kick people around. I wouldn't know, far too nimble, dance, dance, stick that dagger home.

Gladiator: Don't let their showy nature fool you. They lived or died partially on the crowd, they lived or died more on how good they were at killing others. The gladiators with us survived a lot of their kind.

Raider: Likes sticking his knee in people's faces, not quite an arrow but I have a crossbow bolt to deal with that.

Warlord: Come out and play, I got my turtle cracker right here.

Berserker: These guys go on and on and on and on and on, they don't stop through pain. Fortunately they also don't move, sooner or later they are going to have to stop shuffling and deal.

Valkyrie: Dance, dance, avoid the spear, stick my dagger in her side, rinse, repeat. They are probably the most noble of their clans, but here is the thing, everyone dies, including you dear.

Highlander: How...how can someone that big with a weapon that heavy move like that?

Kensei: Ugh, they bait you, they reel you in like a fish, suddenly the sword is coming from the opposite direction.

Shugoki: Great, I brought a dagger to a tree fight! Or he brought a tree to a dagger fight, we'll see.

Orochi: Clever ones are tricksy, some of them like to telegraph their hand, dude I can stand here all day, let it rip and see what happens.

Nobushi: If I fight one of these there is always a river of blood, how much belongs to who is the rub. I respect them but make no mistake, if it's you or me walking away from this, I'm going to make sure it is me. If we work together I will get the blood flowing, you are vicious when you smell blood, I kind of like it >.>

Shinobi: Keep away might work against some, but you'll find some of us are quicker than others. What is the line that comes to mind? Ah yes, welcome to my parlour said the spider to the fly.

09-11-2017, 12:29 AM
My bae Nobushi on everyone else:
"Everyone stay out of my giant bubble"

09-11-2017, 01:32 AM
My bae Nobushi on everyone else:
"Everyone stay out of my giant bubble"

Your bae likes her personal space I take it lol.

09-11-2017, 01:52 AM
Shugoki: I'm a punching bag.
Centurion: Let me punch you.

09-11-2017, 07:06 AM
This Warden wishes his comments to be heard.

At other Wardens: Whoever bought the Theatrical Release of Kingdom of Heaven instead of the Director's Cut is getting flogged. I'm not joking this time!

Lawbringer: We get it, already. Your poleaxe is a pony. You can stop riding it, the children are getting concerned about a grown man acting like a prancing fool.

Peacekeeper: There's a reason nobody wants a second date with you.

Conqueror: Honestly, the only sane one of us in the whole faction. Creepy helmet ornaments aside, they aren't bad to talk to. Glad the library in the prisons are getting good use.

Centurion: Another loony man in a tin can. Can you at least wash your cape?

Gladiator: Hate this guy. We know you're a Deadpool fan. We know. You tell us how "Badass he is", every 4 minutes and how you're his biggest fan and you know everything about him." Joke is over, dude. Get new material or you are not invited to our Mario Party nights anymore.

Raider: For the last time Frank, your Paladin is dead. Stop asking. Just roll a new character.

Warlord: With all the head injuries they do to themselves, you'd think they'd be more reckless.

Berserker: Speaking of reckless. Conq has some funny jokes about why they run out of stamina so quickly. Heh.

Valkyrie: I'd prefer her to be on our team. She can fight. She can drink. She smells better then the Centurion. She isn't crazy like the rest of her faction.

Highlander: It is very hard to take them seriously when they have that terrible comb-over. And he doesn't like Queen. What a barbaric savage.

Kensei: Not a bad guy. I'd call him a worthy opponent. Still won't talk to me after I gave Nobushi the flower for her hat, though. Just scowls at me.

Shugoki: I will not hug you! Get away from me! And stop calling your club Lucille! Weirdo.

Orochi: The only person I know who has those old Kurosawa movies on laser disc. DON'T. EVER. SELL. THOSE.

Nobushi: My little dancing cat girl. I like her company, even if she's a bit of a quirky oddball. Is Kensei your brother? I don't think he likes me anymore.

Shinobi: Viking children have less energy then this hyper active girl. What does she put in her coffee every morning?

09-11-2017, 01:25 PM
My Berserker thinks..

Knights (Fancy men in polished armour):

Warden: What, another one? I've seen 700 of these clones already today. How can people enjoy playing the same class that almost every body else plays? It's like calling your child "John smith". Have some originality. They give me a run for my money though, I always enjoy fighting a good Warden.

Conqueror: Rarely seen and i'm glad of it. Opening this tin of beans is a ballache. I've no respect for any coward who has to hide inside a tin can when he fights.

Peacekeeper: AHAHAHAHA. LIKKEL WOMASS. Come and play. I will hack your tender frame apart and grind your bones to dust.

Lawbringer: Ah, another tin can warrior too afraid to show his face. If he is the big tree, I am the small axe.

Gladiator: What is that silly stick he's carrying? Should have given him a net, too. When I eat a Peacekeeper I like a side order of gladiator.

Centurion: F*ck you. F*ck you and the horse you rode in on. I honestly don’t believe any self-respecting gamer could play this class. The lamest, cheesiest, most boring piece of sh*t ever shat out into PvP game. Anyone remember the world of roguecraft videos from back the vanilla WoW days? Somebody should do a similar video about this loser. I hate this class so much that I go out of my way to single them out in 4v4 games in an attempt to make their lives as miserable as they make mine. I can generally carve them up in a one on one, but you’re only allowed one mistake… /spit.

Vikings (How do I get out of this chickensh*t outfit?):

Raider: This dude is just an ex american football player who somebodies given an axe to and sent him on his way. The only time this fool can hit me is when he’s run me into a wall.

Warlord: Props to this guy. Big, strong, tough and his beard is almost as impressive as my own. A good man to have on-side.

Other Berserkers: I get more anxious about fighting other Berserkers than any other class. This fight just comes down to whoever manages to get a top heavy off first. If there’s another Berserker in 4v4 who is outdoing me, I feel a strange mix of jealousy and shame. But that doesn’t happen often…

Valkyrie: WOAH WOAH WOO WAHHH. How can you not love the Valkyrie? She’s fierce, noisy, and actually requires some skill to cultivate. She also looks awesome. She’s actually one of the best balanced classes in this game, almost. My favourite wide hipped stick swinger.

Highlander: There’s a helmet option for this dude that makes him look like Abraham from the walking dead. Anyone else notice? This aside, I like his style. That sword is completely impractical. Big muscles, nice long sword. Ooo err missus. That feinting spinny attack he does is much like my own but does a HELL of a lot more damage and seems much more difficult to avoid. #balance

Samurai (Flowery fairies):

Kensei: I don’t know why or how but I fear the Kensei. Perhaps because a good one will play my feint game to devastating effect. Perhaps it’s the range that gets me, and the fact he takes my health bar from 100-0 in about 4 hits. I’ve been knocked out of not one, but TWO finals by skilled Kensei. STAY AWAY.

Shugoki: WEEEEYYYYYYYY FAT BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! A shame I don’t see that many of them about. This guy is generally too slow to lay a finger on me, but I’ve met the odd one that has smashed my head out of the arena for a home run.

Orochi: Now we’re talking. I like what this guy is about. Hot nasty speed. A well-played Orochi is my favourite matchup.

Nobushi: Another interesting one. If it wasn’t for spin chop she’d probably be as fear worthy as the Kensei. Fancy coming to battle wearing your dressing gown and a gardening hat?

Shinobi: Gotta love the Shinobi. This guy wears even less armour than I do, though I suspect his chest is not as hairy. If a player has the skill, this is a wicked fun matchup. If not, I generally carve them up faster than you can say “UUUUUUCHIGATANAAAAA”.